Part 2: I’m not Perfect
Many executives we meet struggle to accept their own humanity – limits, breaking points, boundaries. After all there are always more things to be done, quality to be achieved, and people to manage. But when you act as if you are, or should be perfect or invincible, eventually you convince others to require it from you.
Perfectionism is a painful affliction for over achieving executives who won’t tolerate anything less than greatness from themselves and others. One of the consequences of this behavior is that followers, on whom those standards are imposed, typically revolt and withdraw support from the leader. Waiting to pounce on the slightest hint of deficiency, abused followers, starved of any acknowledgement of their own contribution and giftedness, leave no room for their executives to misstep. This becomes a downward spiral. Executives, fearing criticism or exposure of their imperfections, work to hide their humanity, perpetuating the illusion of infallibility. Followers, weary of the unscrupulous behaviors they have seen and come to expect of leaders, see the inherent hypocrisy in their executives, and allow them no margin of error.
We believe it is appropriate for followers to expect their leaders to perform to high standards. Their integrity should be above reproach, and they should have achieved some degree of technical mastery in whatever discipline they’ve chosen. That doesn’t mean people they lead should never be smarter or more proficient in any given area of expertise. In fact, most effective executives have discovered the wisdom in hiring people more talented than they are in key areas over which they have responsibility. If you take on an executive-level role without having achieved reasonable mastery and demonstrated a track record of results, or if you possess questionable principles, you open yourself up to intense scrutiny. The people you lead will question your appointment and believe there are others who would have been better suited for the role, including themselves.
What they really want
Deep down, followers need to know that you know you are flawed. While Steve Jobs may be famous for his hard nose leadership and high expectations, he was very quick to highlight his failures as he did when he said, “I lost a quarter of a billion dollars in a month. I don’t know anyone else who has done that.” Your best offense against unrealistic expectations is to be upfront with your followers about what they can expect from you – where you have strengths, and what your flat sides are. Tell them you welcome their feedback, and encourage them to come to you directly when one of your weaknesses is problematic for them, or is getting in the way of their work or relationship with you.
Before they come to expect perfection, assure them they will more regularly experience your imperfection. Apologize early and often when you make a mistake, and show your followers grace when they slip-up. Establishing an environment of mutual vulnerability and support when things don’t go well actually raises the bar on performance and accountability.